Funny story this !!

“Hey ! I missed you”. Oh fuck ! not again, I hadn’t even finished buttoning up my shirt.


"Stop right there. I’ll give you the sex later, I promise, but first let’s talk about me. Yes you are allowed to call me a self obsessed pig. Infact I want you to. The truth is I don’t want to charm you with fancy words coz frankly I don’t know any. Rather I’ll give you a story so simple, so neat and yet you’ll feel drunk when I’m finished. It always hits you hard when it’s neat, doesn’t it."

....I hadn’t even finished buttoning up my shirt. The night had been a blur to me. Hell ! I didn’t even know if it was night or day. How long was I out ? Was I drugged? Where was I anyways? Vegas or was I still in Paris. Well neither. It had to be someone’s home, the drapes were way too nice, the silk felt soft on my skin. And I could afford neither of those. And yet there was this girl lying on the bed, her head resting comfortably on the pillow, a soft satisfied smile on her face. I had smiled back politely and wondered if I was the reason . And yet no recollection. I didn’t even remember her name. I am usually not this bad, I tell you I’m being framed here.

Pondering, I stood up to freshen myself . Thud! And then everything blacked out.

Everyone has to pay their bills right? So how am I any different. Infact I do way better than most of them .But he’ll be home by now waiting for my call. I had to hurry. I looked around the bar, and sure, there he was. He fit the bill. But he looked too sweet and too drunk to be screwed over like that. Hell ! it would be fun.

Why isn’t she picking up. We left the bar at the same time. He worried about her. It had only been four dates and yet...

They got out of the cab. What the fuck ! The guy is a pig, she thought. He was sweaty for some odd reason. His heartbeat was slow. The cab driver helped her take him to the apartment. Damn ! Why couldn’t she leave him out on the curb. Maybe he’ll come around she thought. He never did for the next three hours.

Was he still conscious? Common don’t you die on me, she thought. She changed his clothing, rubbed his feet, gave him the comfort of her bed, the same bed she rarely slept alone on. She even prayed. Slowly his breathing returned to normal. Thank God. Now she could lie down. Her day had been very tiring.

She could hear him moving. It was the wee hours of the morning. He was up. He looked at her and she smiled, relieved and he smiled back, confused. He was okay after all. Meanwhile her cellphone rang for the nth time since night. She answered. “Hey I missed you”, she said.

Oh fuck ! not again, I hadn’t even finished buttoning up my shirt. Pondering, I stood up to freshen myself . Thud! I was still very drunk I realized and crashed into the bedside lamp. Everything blacked out.

"Sorry no sex in this one. I lied. What can you do. I had to entice you in believing that there was some, else why wud you still be reading. Call me a pig. Infact I want you to. "

By

Himanshu Saxena!! ( if you want to call him a pig..please do..:P)